Afraid
by WhimsicalWonderland
Summary: All of his thoughts, fears, worries… everything someone only would know after being together for ages. But it's only been one year and she already knew everything. She was the one person Chad could say that he loved. And he was afraid. So very afraid.


**Ladies and gentlemen… it's drabble time! :) This, once again, takes place during SWAK.**

**I don't own Chad's innermost thoughts, although, drat, I wish I could. Don't you?**

**Oh! And credit to TeddyLuver for the "she's a miracle, she's beautiful, she's perfect" line I stole out of one of her stories. Love you, Tedds!**

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Afraid

"Friends can still hug, right?" Chad asked, turning around to face the girl he had only just broken up with.

"Yeah! I hug the Randoms all the time!" She exclaimed, her smile lighting up her face.

"Cool!" Chad said, his smile matching hers as he wrapped his arms around her.

Chad brought his hand up and brushed it through her hair. Something about this moment made everything feel… right. Like the rest of the world didn't exist. He knew that he wasn't supposed to be thinking this way. I mean, he was Chad Dylan Cooper for goodness sake! CDC doesn't melt at a girl's touch, they melt at his!

He heard her sigh into the hug, bringing back his previous thoughts. She was a miracle, she was beautiful, she was perfect… and she was no longer his. Just the thought 11 months ago that the famous Chad Dylan Cooper would be standing here in the embrace of the new rival cast member, Allison Munroe, would make him laugh. He had convinced himself that he DIDN'T like her. He put on the show for so long, and it only made him want her more.

It wasn't until not-so-long ago that she actually admitted to returning those feelings. They had been through so much over the past year, all of the fights, the denial, the flirting, and it lead up to this moment.

She began to pull away but Chad refused to let her go, by holding onto her waist. The gorgeous girl in front of him looked up, her chocolate brown eyes shining. God, she was so amazing.

Then a thought struck Chad: she isn't his. He wondered if he should just let her go and start walking away. What's the point of letting this moment go on when afterwards there will be nothing but a bittersweet goodbye? They were only friends. Buddies. Pals. Nothing he could say would ever change that. She said it herself; they just weren't meant to be.

But he was determined. Determined to show her that he could, in fact, change his ways. He could stop being the egotistical jerk she despised and start being the caring person she loved. Or, at least, _did love._

It's like a war was going on inside of him as her eyes stared him down, and she could tell. Her face grew into a small smile as she got lost in his sky blue eyes. She understood him. After only one year, she knew him better than he knew himself. She knew all of his thoughts, fears, worries… everything someone only would know after being together for ages. But it's only been one year and she knew all there was to know. She was the one person Chad could say that he loved. Just looking at her made him nervous. Just hearing her name made his stomach do flips. And he was afraid. So very afraid.

Not afraid of what's to come, but afraid of what it will lead to when they finally figure themselves out. She says she doesn't love him now, how will that change if they were, by some chance, to continue seeing one another? How is there a guarantee that this bond they share won't be broken sometime down the road? People change. Interests change. Loves change.

But the strange this was, he didn't think that his heart would change. There would always be a place in there for her, no matter what happens. If they stay together, break up, stop speaking completely… he will always love her. And for right now, he is just going to live in the moment.

Chad looks at her and smiles, both of them thinking the same thing. They lean down and their lips meet for the first time; sparks fly. He thinks how lucky he is just to be holding her, kissing her, and loving her when there are so many other guys in the world. And that makes him ecstatic, so much so that he smiles into the kiss, and feels her smiling back.

Even if they don't work out in the end, he still has the memories. She stole his heart, and he loves her for it. Loves her more than anything else in the world.

As they pull away, he looks into her eyes and sees the piece of himself that he's been missing. That one piece has been her all along. And he wouldn't trade one thing to have her taken away from him.

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**Writing that made me feel good. I'm not quite sure why, but it did. Could you possibly review? It would mean so much to me. :)**


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